Leading Indian dailies reported the bizarre news of a Mumbai businessman who was arrested for raping his daughter for nine years on the advice of a ‘tantrik’ to improve his business. The 21-year-old daughter exposed her ‘rapist’ father after he began sexually abusing her younger sister, a class 10 student, at the astrologer’s behest. Following the Mumbai sisters’ revelation, a 21-year old college student in Amritsar picked up courage to complain about her father who sexually abused her for eight years. The girl’s traumatized mother who knew about it all along said, “My husband would always find a pretext to send me away so he could be alone with our daughter.” Likewise, a 15-year old’s complaint of prolonged sexual abuse by her father led to the 35-year-old father’s arrest in Nagpur.

Various surveys have been conducted on the issue, and many report widespread prevalence of child sexual abuse (CSA) and incest in the country. Though the authenticity of such data and the methodology have been questioned, the point is, sheer anecdotal evidence itself is quite disturbing. “Bitter Chocolate” by Pinki Virani, documenting the dark world of incest and CSA, is based on the author’s own devastating experience. The book created a sensation back in 2000. There are many Viranis all around us.

Incest Victim Talks

P Sowmya* (name changed) was barely out of her college when she got a proposal for marriage from a friend. “I almost jumped at it. We got married even before I was out of college, and left for the United States. Of course, it did not have my family’s consent.”

In the States, life proved tough. Her husband turned out to be an abuser, and it was months before Sowmya could figure out a way to come back to India. “I did not want to go back to my family. I took the help of a lawyer, got divorce and pursued my studies again. It took me a while to get a degree and land a decent job. That phase was nightmarish,” Sowmya recalls with a shudder.

Why did Sowmya choose to accept the first proposal that came her way? “Not because I really liked the guy, but I was desperate to escape my father,” she responded, trying hard not to betray her revulsion.

Sowmya’s father started abusing her sexually ever since she was ten. “When my mother died, it only got more convenient for him. It was sickening, but then he was my dad, who was also showering affection on me and taking care of me…I won’t talk to anyone of that, but at the first opportunity, I left him. I didn’t realize then, the man I chose was worse…”

When prodded, Sowmya confesses to having sexual problems with her husband. “He was just too violent. I could not handle it. I was reminded of my father, again and again,” she says. It is difficult to guess how violent the man was or whether it was the trauma of her childhood that prevented Sowmya from trying to sort out her problems with her husband.