When Wives Refuse Sex: The Pakistani Story

by Tanya Thomas on  July 24, 2008 at 11:38 AM Sexual Health News
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When Wives Refuse Sex: The Pakistani Story
The brutal fate of many Pakistani women now stands revealed. Experts have opined that most women in the Islamic nation refuse to have sex with their male partners because of the latter's abusive advances and attitudes.

In an article titled 'Women's Perceptions and Experiences of Sexual Violence in Marital Relationships and Its Effect on Reproductive Health' that appeared in Health Care for Women International, experts, Rafat Hussain and Adeel Khan of the School of Health, University of New England, came up with approximately 40 hours of taped interviews, which included eight key informant interviews, three focus groups with 24 participants, and 10 in-depth interviews.

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They opined that a woman's refusal to have sex could lead to varied responses—resentment, suspicion, anger, physical violence, and forced sex.

For some women, the ongoing psychological trauma due to repeated physical violence made them want to avoid sexual contact.

As one young participant put it, "My husband is often physically violent, never apologizes but expects me to have sex even though he may have beaten me up a few hours earlier. How can he expect me to be intimate and loving?"

Many of the participants spoke about the "hidden" nature of sexual violence especially in relationships where there was no outward sign of physical or psychological violence.

Young women talked about excessive fatigue related to long hours of work involving childrearing and doing household chores, which created a situation where sex on demand was seen as another task rather than as an intimate and pleasurable experience.

They said that women also feel embarrassed, especially as their daughters are growing old, by their husband's daily demand for sex.

As another woman, who has been a victim of domestic violence, said: "My husband still wants to have more children and wants to keep on having unprotected sex. I told him, "When you are not providing for these children, then you should not want more children," but the argument has little effect. I have no recourse but to stop having sex with him. This makes him very angry, and he resorts to insults and physical violence."  

A 34-year-old said that her husband has had a vasectomy, and has become more aggressive in his demands for sex, almost on a daily basis and sometimes more than once.

And, when she refuses to have sex, he hits badly.

Source: ANI

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I fully agree with all the said above.

My husband needs at least 3 times sex per day. During my pregnancys he is even more horny. Many times i was crying silent tears while he is using me.

Last month I born our 5th child. Even labours had start, I had to give him vaginal satisfaction.

15 minutes after his ejculation, my daughter was born in our same bed......

NExt evening after delivery he already used my butt for his satisfaction.........

Don´t explain me anything about violence. I had enough of it. But what i do?

I am not allowed to leave him. So I will give birth to some children more and suffer silently my life.

Very sorry to read your story and your suffering in silence. The women of this world empathize with you. Is there not a forum where we can form a supoort group for such women - maybe use the medindia medblogs section- a simple tool that is easy to use.


Your story stinks of propaganda, lies, fiction and BULLSHIT ;]

saad m

It is true the wives need good atmosphere to perform sex. I think writer need to do more search because the article is not completed he must give solution there.

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