Amie Jones, 21, of Harpurhey, Manchester was diagnosed with postpartum psychosis in 2014, 11 days after the birth of her son Oscar. The new mum was contemplating suicide and heard voices telling her to run away and end her life.
Jones, said the mental health condition caused her to have intense panic attacks and hallucinations. She wants to raise awareness of the illness, which can affect a woman after she has a baby, so other mothers "don't feel alone". "I had no idea what post-partum psychosis was," Jones said.
"I'd thought I was hearing a voice in my head, like in a film where you have two twins, one evil and one good. It was my voice in my head, but an evil version."
Speaking about her ordeal for the first time, she said: "I found out I was seven weeks pregnant at the end of December 2013 which came as a bit of a shock. I was 18 and panicked. I crumbled. I punched my stomach, my head was all over the place. It was not what I wanted. I had so much doubt in my mind, that I felt I should just end my life now."
Jones considered having an abortion just four days after she found out she was pregnant, but decided against it. Jones said towards the end of her second trimester in April 2014 she felt so low that she went to see a specialist mental health midwife and psychiatrist at St Mary's Hospital in Manchester, who diagnosed her with bipolar disorder and increased her dosage of the anti-depressant Prozac.
Jones was voluntarily admitted to a psychiatric hospital at the mother and baby unit in Manchester's Wythenshawe Hospitaland remained there from mid-August 2014 until November 2014.
She said: "At the time it seemed dire, but now I see it was a fantastic ward with fantastic nurses. I could see Oscar when I wanted, but I couldn't be with him alone."
Jones said she would frequently hear voices in her head and have panic attacks during this time, but said the support she received while at the Wythenshawe Hospital was amazing.
Gradually, with all the support she has received, she has formed a bond with her 18-month-old son. "I'm a lot happier now, but I'm still not 100 per cent better," she said. "I'm still on lots of anti-psychotic medication, as well as medication to help my depression, and I have my community psychiatric nurse from Ramsgate House that I can call. I love the bones of Oscar now. I never thought I would feel this way about him. When he goes to stay with his dad I miss him."