An interesting online survey which received responses from more than 1500 people showed that marriages, be it happy marriages, new marriages, or lasting ones, had a common thread running. Most marriages had a certain degree of disagreement between the couples, nagging was common, as most couples confessed to this unsavory trait.
The survey also found huge gaps in communication between men and women. Hilary Smith of Relationship Services said, "Even in the happiest, longest lasting of relationships, couples disagree. We were not surprised that the survey found a difference between men and women around communication."
What came out stark in the survey was the common opinion of most men, that women nagged while most women complained that men don't listen. Four out of ten women felt that indifference from men cropped up as a major bone of contention in marriage and three out of 10 men blamed incessant nagging by women. Thankfully there was consensus about the futility of revenge - 1.7 percent of respondents supported 'revenge' as against 70% who saw it as a waste of time.
The most heartening news is that over time, the couple learnt the ropes of handling differences better. Infact, newer relationships portray higher difficulties than longer relationships. What came out as overriding causes of marital disagreements pertained to parenting, money, housework, and time pressures.
When couples were questioned about the ways in which they solved their problems, communication, clarity of the problem and of course apologizing figured as three important ways to make peace. Universally, everybody wanted to be treated with respect by their spouse and this mattered the most, the survey revealed.