Parents, often unintentionally blurt out stuff that comes in the wrong way and makes an argument turn ugly. So, to make things easier, we’ve listed down 7 things you shouldn’t say to your child, and 7 things that you should, to build a better relationship with your kid, alongside teaching the child to act responsibly.
Things you SHOULD say to your kid-
#1: What do you think?- Authority over a decision is important, especially for a teenage kid. Merely asking him about his views will make him realize that you care enough to ask for his opinion, even if you don’t follow everything he says.
#2: I’m glad you are mine- Remember that kids are growing out through their protective shells as they reach adolescence. During such an age, it is important to make your child feel loved, and respected achievements, big or small.
#3: Do you need a hug?- Growing up can be tough and broken hearts (and broken iphones) just add to it. There may be a time when your kid might feel vulnerable and sensitive; at such times, don’t just ask if your child needs a hug, just hug the kid.
#4: I trust you- Trust shouldn’t be played around with, and once you are done explaining this to your kid, say these three words out loud.
#5: I am proud of you- Encouraging your child can always play a major role in strengthening the parent-kid bond. Let your kid know of how proud you are of the person your kid is turning into.
#6: You are so cool- The word ‘cool’ works with every kid. It boosts confidence, makes your kid open up to you, and does so much more.
#7: I love you- Don’t limit these three eternal words to your spouse. Save it for your kids at some special occasions. It is bound to make your kid melt and feel close to you.
Things you definitely SHOULN’T-
#1: Why can’t you be more like____? - We’ve heard enough cases of suicides due to peer pressure, parental pressure and comparison hitting the tabloids to stop using this sentence.
#2: You always do this- Scolding your child for petty mistakes is the first thing you need to stop doing. Take it easy. Your kid is still a kid.
#3: I told you so- So your kid did something you told him not to, and then fell into trouble. The ‘I told you so’ seems to be the perfect way to make your kid realize a mistake at such a point, but actually, aggravates your child. Your child may then either continue doing forbidden things, or do nothing at all and turn submissive.
#4: Because I said so- This sentence robs your kid of the much-needed ‘authority’ and could push your child to do worse things in anger.
#5: Don’t worry- This may seem really unreasonable, but it’s a major mistake most of us do. Saying ‘don’t worry’ to your kid will make the child think that you are ignoring the child’s feelings and concerns. Handle such a situation with care, and use a more positive approach.
#6: Don’t do it like this- Every individual has his/her own style of doing things. So if your kid tends to pick up facts more quickly by writing it down, allow the child to do so.
#7: Don’t hang out with____- Friends are important to growing kids, and forcing your child to make friends with a particular group of kids will narrow your child’s mind and drive the kid further away from anything you say. If you are sure your kid is in the wrong company, explain how mingling with the wrong people can affect your child, and how it may end up horribly. Pick up a newspaper for a few examples!