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A Recipe For Love

by Dr. Reeja Tharu on Oct 29 2007 8:20 PM
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‘What is life without love?’ is an oft-quoted line. Almost everyone succumbs to this sublime emotion at one time or the other. It is that phase in a person’s life when the world transforms into a paradise and life is at its magical best. To be able to love is perhaps a testimony to the rudiments of godliness that rests within.

Love is ‘blind’ but not binding; it can occur anywhere, at any time, to anyone. Conveying love is a different ball game all together and often results in a frantic foraging for words. This is perhaps because we fail to acknowledge our ability to convey our thoughts through non-verbal cues.

What then are these gesticulations that invite, courtship, affection and intimacy?

Love Signs

The mating dance involving ritualistic maneuvers is common among animals - from the lowly spider to giant mammoths. If that is the case, can man be far behind?

It is interesting to learn that in the presence of a potential mate our bodies indulge in an ‘involuntary pantomime’ - a phenomenon as old as the human race. It is this ‘gestural dance’ that abetted man in his quest for a suitable mate, to bring forth and to multiply.

There are numerous gestures that transmit the message, ‘I like u’ to another. Synchronizing one’s behavior with those of another, helps bonding to bud and to blossom. Feminine hips will often have an accentuated roll while walking past a potential mate. If a woman tilts her head or twirls her hair around her fingers, she is subtly displaying her attraction. A person who fondly gazes into another’s eyes for a prolonged period conveys care, sincerity and trustworthiness. Taking up an unbridled and open posture relates vulnerability and trust.

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Stoking the ‘fire’ with Fear

Two persons experiencing a rush of adrenalin together may provide the perfect target for cupid’s arrows. According to a study carried out by psychologits Arthur Aron and Don Dutton in the 1970s,men who met a woman atop a high, rickety bridge experienced a sexier and a more romantic encounter than when they had met her on a low, stable bridge. A roller-coaster ride too can set off the fireworks as some persons experienced a ‘high’ in intimacy levels after a roller- coaster ride together. Similarly, couples felt more ‘warmed up’ after watching a suspense-filled movie than after watching a calm one.

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What, then, is the igniting factor? Although there seems to be a correlation between physiological arousals , such as anxiety, and physical attraction, the answer continues to remain under a cloud.

‘Love’ly Music

'If music be the food for love, play on', suggested The Bard.

Psychologists at the North Adams State College, Massachusetts, have affirmed this statement when they discovered that women who were browsing through the photos of men found them to be a lot more attractive while listening to soft-rock music, compared to other kinds of music, or no music at all.

Love and Laughter

When strangers share funny moments, their laughter is bound to draw them closer . This theory was corroborated by a study carried out by US psychologists Arthur Aron and Barbara Fraley. They discovered that when total strangers were made to indulge in playful pastimes that induced laughter, such as learning dancing steps, love stepped in unwittingly.

Eyes Speak

‘Visual communication’ is an emotionally and sexually charged act. The eyes of those seeking intimacy will follow a 'triangular’ pattern – eye to eye, then the mouth, chin, and further down to the rest of the body and then back again to look at the eyes. Psychologists have shown that when strangers locked eyes, they developed feelings of intimacy. Gazing into another’s eyes is reported to ignite those areas of the brain associated with rewards.

Love vs. Euphoria

Typically charecteristic of the modern times, efforts are on to discover a short route to love.

A nasal spray comprising of the hormone Oxytocin has the potential to promote trust , often considered the ‘ basic building block’ of any relationship. On the other hand, the hormone Vasopressin builds bonding .

Illegal stimulants such as amphetamine or cocaine too can whip up a ‘falling in love’ euphoria by raising the level of the neurotransmitter, dopamine . Phenyl Ethyl Amine (PEA) christened the ‘love molecule’is capable of creating feelings commonly linked to love, such as excitement and apprehension. PEA is abundant in chocolates.

Elevated levels of Dopamine and PEA may be accomplished through exercising too! So get those muscles grinding if relationship building is not your cup of tea!

Building relationships is quintessential to human existence; resorting to artificial means, such as use of stimulants, to create euphoria is the handy work of sick and lazy minds. A person’s body language often tells more than what is orally conveyed. Comprehending non- verbal communications promotes the ability to understand others while also attempting to analyze the messages that we impart to others. If adopted well, these gestures may satiate the verbally- shy and the emotionally- challenged, and assuage the feelings of many a love-lorn!

Source-Medindia


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